Have you ever been, or felt like, a second choice? I have and it is one of those things I can’t forget. I keep counting each person over in my head. Or thinking about if it will happen again when school starts. I have began to notice half of the forevers in friendship aren’t real.
I had confessed to a friend I felt they didn’t like me when we met. It turns out they hadn’t, they didn’t want to be my friend as much as someone else’s. I thought I had one true friend I hadn’t made cry or angry at me. Turns out I hadn’t.
I feel so confused when I think about what people have said about me. I never know what to think of myself. Some have said terrible things and others have said I used to be that way. But who am I now?
All I see is someone who is scared to start over, of being a second choice, of being hated, of hurting people, of not being normal, and mostly of being a disappointment. I know that people (will) say things like ‘your not a second choice’ or ‘your not a disappointment’. Thing is people lie, cheat, steal, keep secrets, and so much more. If they didn’t this world would be either of two things:
1. Amazing place where you either hate or love.
2. A terrifying place where humanity killed itself because of what was said to them.
I personally think the second one.
I think that life has just put us in a lemon, but:
– Your not a Sad Story